You should follow me on Twitter: @techshopboysJD
Being conceived under the shadow of a gamma ray mushroom cloud, Jason was embedded with trivial powers that would shape his life to come. By three, Jason had mastered PacMan on the Atari, built a life-sized replica of the Death Star out of playdough and jelly beans, and had watched over 600 movies on fast forward. It is said that he memorized the dialogue and fully understood the plot after the first showing. Shunned for his trivial powers in highschool, Jason secluded himself in an outdated fallout shelter which was modified with ten TV monitors, stacks of Calvin and Hobbs and the Farside graphic Novels, and a radio. It was there, in the Shelter of Solitude, that Jason would hone his senses, exercise his powers of perception, and embrace his role as….USELESS TRIVIA MAN!!! Protector of the pop culture, Keeper of the 12 sided die, Voice of the already voiced people. He now roams the streets, err interwebs in search of the most trivial tidbits of Tech, Tinseltown, Television, and Tunes. Whenever you need a movie quote, Jason will be there. Whenever you need a lyric, Jason will be there. Whenever you need someone to mow your yard, Jason will be….far away from you and unavailable. So, now you know of the origin story of Jason, aka USELESS TRIVIA MAN, and knowing is honestly like a quarter of the battle.
You should follow me on Twitter: @techshopboysMW
Emerging victoriously into the world fully grown in a blazing white haze with an Intellivision controller in hand. Mike has been saving damsel’s in distress and reigning over commonfolk for nearly two and a half million years. You would not know it by looking at him, but he is able to leap building’s, see through walls and snipe a headshot from miles away all with the touch of a button. Some people say that he is able to do such incredible thing’s because he is the product of being built by scientists, specifically to travel back in time to save us all from the greater evil’s of this planet only to be sidetracked by his Xbox. Other’s say that it is because he is from a distant planet found in the Rosetta Nebula System (if you don’t know what that is stop reading now) that has yet to catch up to the almighty being that is “video games”. But whatever the case, he is here to tell us which “video simulations” and “audio food” are worth his precious time. Forever searching for the ultimate in video games and music, Mike has made it his life goal to defeat all that is worth defeating and listen to all that is listenable. If you are ever in need of Mike’s great gift’s, simply use the ring’s provided. And by your powers combined, he is Captain…(something clever inserted here)
About: Our Founder’s
You should follow us on Twitter @techshopboys
In the beginning, we were all apes. We would fight it out in hand to hand combat over scraps of food. Cue the 2001 Space Odyssey Theme. Then, luckily, one ape stumbled upon a black monolith, with a home key at the bottom and a high-definition retina display. The monolith would bestow knowledge upon the ape. Knowledge of advancement through smaller packets known as “Apps”. Through a period of trial and error, numerous downloading and deletions, and a few curse grunts here and there, the ape began to understand the monolith and use it to its full capabilities. Empowered, Alpha Ape, as we should call him, sought to control his tribe with knowledge instead of violence. The ape would use a new tool, a game controller, to gain advantage over the other apes in battle, most likely in Call of Duty multiplayer mode. But the monolith was not done yet. It would inspire other apes to read cartoon stories laid out in panels, to create and watch recordings of other apes acting out stories, music, and so much more! The advancement of the ape civilization had begun.
The monolith would not appear again until the year 2011, but for the sake of you movie purists out there, call it 2010 if you wish. The monolith presented itself in a distant dining establishment in Middle America, bringing together two unknown people from different backgrounds and inspiring them. Unsure of what to do, the duo toiled and pondered on the meaning of what the monolith presented them until the answer became obvious. Through blogging and podcasting, the two would form one team to guide humanity through the rough waters of technology until the reappearance of the monolith again, which would probably present itself on a cloud with some new operating system.
The team came to be known as The Tech Shop Boys
And the legend begins…